pain caused by u~

i just cant stand this pain anymore

L.O.V.E !

“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.”

--Neil Gaiman.

am i normal?

why am i being so SENSITIVE lately?

the older i get,the more i don't understand myself..

am i the only who suffer from this undefined feeling?

is it normal to feel this way?

we can close our eyes to the things we do not want to see..

but can we close our heart to the things that we do not want to feel??

smile :)

I’m going to smile and make you think I’m happy,

I’m going to laugh, so you don’t see me cry,

I’m going to let you go in style,

and even if it kills me – I’m going to smile.

born into the heart of ladies :)

to anyone who are interested in shawls..
you are most welcomed to visit http://beebileidi.blogspot.com/
if interested..
just contact them or me~
thanx~

being teachers??!

those who are not going to be teachers think that being a teacher is an easy job

they think that teachers are lucky because teachers have longer holidays

they think teachers only teach students about particular subjects

But we, future teachers believe that it is not that easy and gonna be tough for us for the first few years

We know that our job is far more important than just only teaching students about science, math, physics, chemistry, language etc

We know that we need to educate our younger generations who are going to be leaders of the nation and serve their country well

That is how we, future teachers feel about being teachers~

only you~

without u, i am so alone..

without u, i can feel the emptiness..

with u, love is everywhere..

with u, the world is mine..

u shine my day..

u make my day seems so bright..

u are my world..

u are the one i need right now~

:"(

h.a.t.i.k.u~

h.u.j.a.n l.e.b.a.t
s.e.p.e.r.t.i t.u.r.u.t m.e.n.a.n.g.i.s.i
n.a.s.i.b.k.u

o.h h.u.j.a.n
m.e.n.g.e.r.t.i.l.a.h h.a.t.i i.n.i

o.h a.n.g.i.n
h.i.l.a.n.g.k.a.n.l.a.h k.e.g.e.l.i.s.a.h.a.n h.a.t.i

o.h h.a.t.i
b.u.a.n.g.l.a.h r.a.s.a c.i.n.t.a

sports carnival at University of Sydney!

badminton team~

amanat terakhir~

layak jd center je

loud and energetic supporters!!

netball team macquarie

mkn2 di shalom yg sgt best!

orange gurls

priceless chapter in my life!

do u ever miss ur previous time in school??

do u ever miss ur frens damn much?

do u ever miss someone so much
until u wanna hold them tight in ur arms??

at dis moment..
really3 miss my schoolmates damn much!

millie
thanx so much 4 understanding me..
u r a very great fren i ever had
our memeories in SSP for 5 years..
n a few months in KMPP..
i will never forget!

didie,mizah and amy
u r da best teammates i ever had..
thanx 4 ur support when we were in basketball team..
i still miss to play basketball with u gurls..

keep on joining open tournament..
keep on winning them all as u gurls did..
never ever forget to share da prizes wif me!

dikteen,khad,jojo,pondot,mas, che bie
i hope our memories in SSP will be in mind forever..
really2 love to hang out wif u gurls just like before!
miss 2 hear dikteen n jojo merepek..
miss 2 hear khad n mas bgaduh..
miss nk dgr ur laugh, che bie!
hahahaha..
pondot!
do u still remember
where did we get dat nickname 4 u??
miss to stay up n study wif u gurls..
mkn maggi too!
bestnye~

hope can hangout wif u gurls more often..
before u gurls get married..
hehehe..

whenever i feel lonely..
i think about u gurls..
think how u gurls had filled up my life
with ur laughter~
whenever i feel sad..
i think about u gurls..
think how u gurls had made me laugh
eventho i was sad..
whenever i miss u gurls,
i keep on remembering
our best time together!

love u gurls sgt3..
forever friends!

thanx a lot 4 da surprise birthday party!

kn0ck!kn0ck!kn0ck!

"wh0's dat?"

~silence~

knock!knock!knock!

"wh0's dat?"

"mimie,sarah here!could u please c0me downstairs for a while?da RA would like to see u"

"really?"

"yup!and shen ann too"

"OK!neway y?"

"just come downstairs!hurry up.."

"OK!''

"wait!could u please wear smthg more proper?dun forget ur tudung too!"

"uik!y??lorh!mlsnye..yela2.give me some time.ok?"

"ok.hurry up!"

~after a few minutes~

tap!tap!tap!tap!


"hepi birthday to u~
hepi birthday to u~
hepi birthday to mimie n shen ann~
hepi birthday to u~"








































hoho!
a surprise birthday party for me and shen ann..
we never expect this from u guys..
eventhough i know u all love both of us very much!!
hehehe..
thanks to all my friends who are involved in organizing this party..
for those delicious and great food..

vimal and lee
for da pizza!delicious..

flo
for da prawn cracker!nak lg :)

murni
for sandwiches and apples..

farouk and khairudin
for spaghetti and puding roti!yummy~

to mard n su..
those hand-make cakes sgt3 tempting..
really2 like them..


































actually..
they prepared all those food when i went to badminton try-out in the gym..
before i went there..
i asked mard and su to come along!
they kept on refusing to follow me~
su said she's tired and need some rest..
mard said if we dun need to pay to enter the gym..
she'll follow me!
unfortunately..
the gym is not mine..
so we have to pay my dear!!
really2 frust..
rase nk mrajok je~
hehehe..
finally..
i knew their reason!
thanx..

meghe n sarah didn't said a thing about this to me
when we were on our way to the gym..
both of u are really good in keeping secret..
lina too!



to all cohort 5 Macquarians~
mard,su,reva,flo,sarah,nani,murni,alia,
izza,amirah,lina,intan,jen
farouk,imran,aiman,aisamuddin,
vimal,lee,adnin,khairuddin,iqbal,
and not to forget
farrel

~thanx for everything~
~i didnt expect di party n really2 appreciate it!~
~thanx for da lovely presents and cards!~
~thanx again..~
~u guys cherish my day in sydney~






love u guys!!mmuuaahhhx~

withOut thEm~

celebrating my 21st birthday

without my family by my side

is what i called

"EMPTINESS"



celebrating my 21st birthday

without my best buddies by my side

is what i called

"LONELINESS"

miSs my fAmiLy~

miSs my bEst bUddiES!!

:(

specially for my beloved sister~

i dedicate this lovely pink cake to my
beloved younger sister , nUR atHirAh zOLkEpLi who are now 8 years old on
10th March 2009

< bOth oF us wErE bOrN on dA sAmE dAtE>



hApPy biRthdAy tO yOu~

HaPpy biRthDay tO yOu~

hAppY biRtHdAy tO aDik~

hApPy biRthdAy tO yOu!


hAppy 8th birthdAy
aDik!!

• May ALLAH bless you always..
• study smart and grab best results..
• make abah and mak proud of you..
• don't be too boyish!!
• k.LOng LOVEs yOu so mUch eventhough she aLways bully you~
  

oNCe agAin...

k.LONg LOvEs yOu dAmN muCh!!!

mmUAaahhxxxXX~

my pAssiOn~

dun know why suddenly tonite i feel like WRITING my blog..
just want to AVOID my mind from thinking about YOU~
i have to MAKE myself busy..
i HAVE to!

last week i've finished reading a novel..
"Something borrowed" by EMILY GIFFIN..
a very INTERESTING novel for me..
LOVE and FRIENDSHIP thingy..

this is another book i bought last week..
"an offer u cant refuse"
by Jill Mansell~
i've read a novel by JILL MANSELL before..
"make up your mind"
really2 interesting story..
hope dis 1 will be as interesting as before..
hope can buy ALL jill mansell's novels..
so have to allocate my ALLOWANCE for novels..
it's not a big deal as long as i can read the novels~
:)

another book i bought today..
eventho i haven't read the jill mansell's novel yet..
which i bought earlier..
it's an offer i cant refuse
as 'the holiday' by erica james is only worth me below $6..
it's cheap rite??
an offer which i can NEVER refuse!!
hehe :)

honesty~

i hate liar!!

for me honesty is the best policy..
no matter what u do..
u must be honest eventho it hurts!
truth is always hurtful rite??
its better to hurt now than later..
so..
to anyone who has friends..
just be honest to them..
eventho its hard..
be honest!!
it's worth to have an honest friend rather than having 100 friends who lie to u~

how much i miss u~

just dont know how to put into words..
how much i miss u sooo much..
how i miss my family damn much..
how i miss malaysia very much!

eventho almost a month in sydney..
still missing them..
for every moment in my life here..
still keep on thinking about them every moment before i fell asleep..
still hoping dat these two years pass by very fast..

its not that i'm not grateful for the chance to be here today..
just to admit dat i'm not dat strong enough..
not really strong as i thought..
to be apart from them..
for quite a long time..